9-Liner: Nine Steps Towards Happiness
If you’re like me, you like following a series of steps and instructions. This isn’t gospel, it’s a start. Some fundamental ideas that have helped me glean insight and stay afloat. In classic military format - the 9-Liner…
Acknowledge your fears and concerns
After service, life is very different. You’re leaving a comfort bubble. Its a new game with new rules, and a lot of hazards you may not be able to identify until it’s too late. Acknowledge what you fear and then make moves to conquer it and excel. Your fears and concerns are shared with every single veteran, so you are never alone.
FEAR - False Evidence Appearing Real
The fear is something that lives within you. Remember that the world is not made up entirely of people out to hurt you or kill you. Your brain has been taught to search for threats that don’t manifest unless you want them to. Realise that within the unlimited potential of the universe, resides freedom from fear.
Taking ownership for the fears you have is one of the hardest but also most powerful things you can do.
Write down your long term vision
Your long term vision should be clear and powerful. An example is -
I will be happy, strong and healthy.
I will be surrounded by good friends and loving whanau.
I will make more than enough money to sustain the lifestyle I choose.
I will be happy with my job and finish each day filled with joy.
I will be ready for whatever challenges life puts in front of me.Be as specific as you can. Don’t ask or plead. Make a definitive statement for what you want, for everything you need to be happy.
Then get ready, because you are going to get rewarded. Sending out messages like this always get a response.
Design a timeline for your goals
Pick a goal. Write it at the bottom of the page. At the top, write where you are right now.
Work back up from the bottom. Reverse engineering your life plans will help you to think in a new way, without any negative stumbling points that we can be bad for.
You’ll notice your success starts early on, only after a few moves.
You may find steps you didn’t think of and opportunities you didn’t think to explore.
This is one of the many military planning tools that are useful. Plan your walk, walk your plan.
Loose the ego
‘Everyone loves a soldier until they stop fighting and come home’
Be open and honest with people. Be prepared to answer questions or take criticism about your service. Not everyone understands the complexities and technical aspects of the military, so be patient.
Shutting people out or dismissing differing opinions is the surest way to being alone or alienated. Hang out with people different to yourself or other soldiers and do what you can to see life through their eyes.
The soldiers ego is a mask of strength, pride, and honour. Its important to take off that mask and develop the person underneath it.
Write an honest CV
Your qualifications from the military don’t always translate out into the world. Fortunately, the qualifications that do are worthwhile to mention and could save you a lot of time and a lot of money.
Make sure you check your Record of Learning from NZQA to see exactly what your qualifications are. If you have done a JNCO course, you will have a teaching certificate many people on the street do not. Use your assets to your advantage.
Make brief mentions of your career achievements. Do what you can to make them relevant to the jobs you want to apply for. Just remember that operational experience does not make for much than good stories at lunch time, so consider leaving them out. If they belong on your CV, mention them in your cover letter if they are relevant.
Write a compelling cover letter. It should be written to suit the employer you are addressing, not a generic format. Mention your interest in the job you are seeking and why you are applying. It should express passion for the job, and what value you can bring to their company.
Employers and business owners want to invest in people and assets that bring value. Telling them that you’re a professional and honest person is something that everyone says, it’s kind of like saying that you’re going to do your laces up correctly and not murder anyone.
Your passion for learning, working with a team, motivating and teaching others and developing ideas are the traits that successful people want to have around their work.
Don’t be afraid to negotiate conditions and certainly don’t be afraid to ask for more pay after the first offer.
Carefully review your contract. Make sure you read the fine print and don’t get locked into a bad deal. Having to pay for your PPE and training is against the Health and Safety at Work Act 2015.
See what’s out there
Don’t sign up for the first job you’re offered. See whats our there first. There are some fantastic opportunities to learn and earn money.
Jobs you might have always dreaded doing may actually be well payed and enjoyable, the same way the military looks to a lot of people.
Leaving the military can seem like desertion from your brothers and sisters. It isn’t going away, ever, so remember that if life outside isn’t suited to you there is no shame in returning. Remember - it’s just another way to make money.
You aren’t committed with long term contracts and long spanning release dates. If you don’t enjoy your job, find a new one. Don’t get your heart set on anything if your heart doesn’t truly resonate with it or the pay doesn’t weigh up.
Advance your knowledge base
Your mind has been conditioned to learning at a high volume, quickly. Quench that thirst for knowledge and use it to absorb the skills you need for your new job.
Take on new hobbies like sports and gym work outs. You’ll find it great fun doing things your way, in your time. It’s important to train the brain as well. Reading, painting, drawing and music are excellent ways to express yourself and learn to be an artist.
You may have suffered at high school with reading and learning, but the military has been an experience in paperwork and study. Maintain that and use it to learn things you never go the chance to properly do at school.
Check your NZQA profile. They don’t update your NCEA level and credit count once you leave school. You may find you have gone up a level.
Contribute to your community
Joining local sports teams and groups will help you integrate with the local community. You’ll be amazed how many other veterans are out there, and you share an instant connection.
Offer guidance to those thinking about joining the military. Sharing the knowledge from your experience is invaluable to younger generations thinking about joining up.
Join the various Facebook pages run by your former Unit and other veterans. Keeping in touch with the times is good to remind you that your friends are only a message away.
Make time for relaxation
You’re free to roam as far as you want, without reporting in to anyone. Take the time to use and appreciate that.
Make it part of your vision to travel, experience new cultures, catch up with old friends and see the country side.
Visiting places you had been for military training allows you to see it in a new light. Tekapo in the Mackenzie Basin and Waiouru of the Central Plateau are some of the most stunningly beautiful areas in the world, when you take the time to appreciate it with new eyes.
You’ve got this!
You’ve done a great service, no matter the length, service, whether you deployed or saw action or not.
You are surrounded by people who support you. It’s easy to shut people out and ignore the love you are receiving when you are in pain. Pain is a normal reaction.
You’ve been through a hard experience that not many people can comprehend… but you can. It’s made your genes stronger. You’re a fighter, with a fighters spirit.
The right way is usually the hardest. Get your chin up, pull your shoulders back, and go get after it. You deserve it.